Ugly Men

I am surrounded by ugly men. I am not shy or reserved when I write this. I am angry at those that choose to be fucking prick mother fuckers. People may have heard of the term "nice guys finish last." My friend Erin says that she hates that term, because in the long run "nice guys" usually get what it is that they want in the end. I am inclined to agree with Erin on this one. She's pretty smart. But that is not exactly what I am talking about. Many ugly men can be "nice guys," with that I am sure. So, it is the internal which I am trying to explore here. Men and women are both animals, and we have aches and pains that need to be satisfied. Hungers which need to be fed, and pressures that need to be lifted. We are searching for whatever can free ourselves from whatever shackle it is that we are burdened with. Some of us choose to do it without hurting those around us, without preying on weaker people in order to accomplish or satisfy our wants. It is NOT those men which I am referring to.

What is it that ulgy men are trying to do then? Freedom as I know it is a thing which allows one to be balanced. When we are balanced we are able to make proper decisions, thereby influencing those around us in a positive way. Ugly men do not. They are wolves, but in a bad way. I am in no way talking down about wolves because there are different types of wolves within a pack. Each has their own role to do, their own role to lead. And make no mistake, it is those certain pack wolves which I am talking about. They seek weaknesses in their prey and and selfishly satisfy their greed. Their base desires. There is something of a consciousness I am talking about. Some of us who are not ugly men have thought of being that ugly man once or twice. That man that just indiscriminately feeds on others weaknesses and faults, whether it is through the physical or the mental. Our tools are sharpened in order to take advantage of people and our relationships. But we don't. We don't because we want to look at ourselves in the mirror and be happy with who we see. It's a lonely life sometimes.

I suppose that this is all about self-control. Like controlling a punch, it is the same as how deep or how far you take your relationships. Where we go and how we get there is within your control. We all have choices. Ugly men are sometimes glorified, ie. Mad Men. Every man wants to be cool and rad, but you don't have to fuck over people to get there. You don't have to fill your life with endless and meaningless relationships to get there. If you make your choices with control, then you are not an ugly man. You are just a man. If you communicate to someone your intentions, and are always honest with yourself and others and get what you want then you are not an ugly man. BUT, if you are deceitful, dishonest, or a liar to get what you want, then you are an ugly man. A shitty dude. I am not trying to make a morality statement here. I am just saddened by how many assholes we produce. How many crappy men there are. So blinded by their ridiculous wants and desires that they don't even know that they are being ugly men.

Honesty is something of a learned skill, and I prize it more than anything else in my life. I enjoy how it affects others it because not many people are ever really confronted with honest people. Some of us are searching for something better and are always critiquing ourselves in order to make our lives fuller, without sadness or unhappines. Of course those things like sadness are going to happen but we try and learn how to evolve, how to manouver ourselves and be fluid. Kind of like a lone wolf in a forest of hungry swarming packs. He relies on his own, befriends others without really wanting anything from them, just their company and some nice chemistry. Then he moves on because he realizes that some of these people and things are all illusions. And he is extremely lucky if he finds other like minded individuals. He keeps them close because he needs them with every fibre of his being. Ugly men are not individuals. They are pathetic men who give other men a bad name. If you make someone smile or make someone happy for a moment, honestly and with integrity without wanting something in return you are not only a good man but a good person too. And that's just nice.